In the age of digital transactions and instant, facile access to funds, the topic of money management spans beyond the mere figures and balances. It’s an emotional landscape dotted with childhood memories, societal pressures, and sometimes, deep-seated traumas. In the latest episode of the Brainy Moms podcast, financial therapist Lindsey Konchar joined Sandy Zamalis to shed light on these emotional complexities, focusing on how our backgrounds shape our perceptions and behaviors regarding money.
Lindsey recounts her unique journey into the financial therapy realm, which took a significant turn during the pandemic. As a certified therapist, she found herself grappling with postpartum anxiety while simultaneously pursuing an innovative career path. This fusion of therapy and financial education led her to explore how emotional and behavioral factors influence financial decisions. She emphasizes the importance of understanding and reshaping our financial narratives. Lindsey highlights research indicating that our money habits typically take shape by the age of ten—a time when many parents may not even consider how they discuss finances in front of their children. The messages we receive—from “money doesn’t grow on trees” to implicit pressures surrounding wealth—create a foundation that can haunt us well into adulthood.
One particularly poignant aspect that emerged during our conversation was the notion of ‘money scripts.’ These psychological patterns formed from past experiences can drive avoidance behavior or create fear around financial discussions. Lindsey details the common emotional barriers, especially among women, who might struggle with discussing finances due to avoidance shaped by how they learned about money as children. In contrast, many men might feel a societal pressure to ‘provide,’ which complicates the dynamics even further, particularly in relationships.
Moving to the dynamics in couples, she explains how miscommunications often arise from these differing styles. One partner may be a meticulous planner, hyper-focused on spreadsheets and budgets, while the other avoids money discussions due to anxiety. This disparity can strain a relationship, leading to resentment or misunderstandings about spending habits, risks, and financial goals. Lindsey advocates for shared experiences regarding money discussions. Initiating healthy, judgment-free conversations around financial aspirations can significantly improve dynamics within relationships, allowing both partners to express their thoughts freely.
We further delve into financial literacy for children, an area in which many parents often feel insecure. However, Lindsey assures listeners that it is possible—and beneficial—to engage children in meaningful money conversations from a young age. By doing so, we can empower our children to understand not just the ‘how’ of money management but also the ‘why.’ She suggests strategies for creating allowance systems that teach spending, saving, and investing behaviors. For example, designating portions of their allowance for spending, saving, giving, and investing cultivates financial mindfulness early on.
Lindsey also discusses practical financial instruments, such as 529 plans for college savings. New regulations offer flexibility and advantages that allow parents to invest for their children’s education beyond traditional uses. This approach equips families to make potentially life-altering financial decisions with foresight. Moreover, Lindsay explains how adding teens as authorized users to a credit card can help them build credit while teaching responsibility.
As the episode wraps up, Lindsey leaves us with insightful thoughts on intentional financial living. Modern conveniences may lead individuals into thoughtless spending, but by integrating financial self-care into our everyday routines, we can pave a way to a more secure future. We encourage listeners to be deliberate about their financial habits and discussions, regardless of their current stages. The key takeaway? Empowerment begins with awareness and open dialogue.
This enlightening conversation with Lindsey Konchar underscores the importance of merging emotional understanding with practical financial education. As listeners, we discover that navigating finance is not solely about figures; it is also about relationships, the language we use around money, and fostering healthier money habits for future generations.
Listen to the episode:
Visit the episode page to learn more about Lindsey:
https://www.thebrainymoms.com/2025/02/10/money-management-lindsey-konchar/