The Top 6 Episodes of 2021
Are you a new listener to our Brainy Moms podcast and want to know what you’ve been missing all year? Or maybe you’ve been listening since the beginning but wonder which topics everyone else liked the best. On this special year-end episode of Brainy Moms, Dr. Amy and Teri recap the 6 most popular episodes of 2021. We share which one had the most downloads, the key takeaways from each of those guests, and we even play a short clip from all 6 of those episodes. Join us to hear what you’ve missed and what should be next on your playlist!
Transcript and show notes for this episode:
The Top 6 Episodes of 2021
Dr. Amy Moore:
Hi, and welcome to this very special episode of Brainy Moms. I’m Dr. Amy Moore here with Teri Miller, my co-host. And we are going to talk about our most listened to episodes of 2021. So, we looked at the most popular six episodes, and we’re just going to recap them for you, give you some teaser from each of those episodes so that maybe you can go back and listen to them if you missed them. And we’re excited to bring that to you today. How are you today, Teri?
Teri Miller:
I’m good.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
I’m glad we’re recovering from a crazy windstorm that hit Colorado Springs area.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah, it was insane. There were semi trucks knocked over all over the freeway.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. Trees down. I mean, trees uprooted in neighborhoods, so yeah. Glad that everything is still in blue sky and beautiful today, so that’s good.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Absolutely. All right, so let’s get to it
Teri Miller:
Okay. Yeah. Okay. So, we’re going to go backwards from six to one, the most listened to episode of 2021. And so at number six, drum roll, we had our episode number 132. It aired on November 2nd, and it was with Kim Feeney. And the episode was helping kids cope with big emotions. This episode was really, really impacting to me personally. If you listened to that, if you go back and listen to that episode, you’re going to hear lots of stories. Personally, for me, lots of, as I went back and listened to it, pretty embarrassing and vulnerable and humbling confessions on my part of ways I have not done well as a parent, and things that I’m learning that I learned from Kim Feeney. So, some of the highlights. Kim talked about things that were important that really hit me. I’ll give you my notes, my highlights.
Teri Miller:
A big point she talked about was connection before correction to help kids understand that their feelings are okay. Their big feelings are okay, all feelings are okay, but we may need to address a behavior that’s not okay. And that we can, as parents, model the courage to be imperfect, that we can let our kiddos know, Hey, I have big feelings sometimes too. I act in ways I wish I hadn’t and that we need to apologize and model that imperfection. And then that apology, and then getting back on track. She talked about having one foot out and one foot in. And that was a really cool perspective and what she talked about was when your kid is maybe having a tantrum or having really big feelings, that as a parent, it’s important to have one foot in with that kiddo, so that you can be with them in that feeling. But that you have to have one foot out so that you can also be objective and not get all absorbed in the craziness of those big feelings.
Dr. Amy Moore:
That was actual my favorite part of our entire conversation with Kim.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
And I think we didn’t say Kim is a registered play therapist-
Teri Miller:
Thank you. Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
… and so she specializes solely in working with kids and their families on managing those big emotions. But what I loved about the one foot in one foot out idea is that it’s applicable for every relationship. So, whether it’s your relationship with your spouse, with your older kids, your relationships at work, that we should be able to be able to have empathy for what’s happening in that other person’s heart and mind while still staying calm and sane and rational with the other foot out. And so loved it. I mean, if I could wrap up that entire episode, that was my biggest takeaway. I thought that was the most valuable piece. So, I would love to play a clip of her episode. So, let’s cue that up right now.
Teri Miller:
Okay.
Kim Feeney:
So, I teach the parents to reflect the feelings to the child. You’re angry, you’re worried, you’re even excitement. We can get overly excited and that can wind up causing havoc sometimes. So, Daniel Siegel says, name it to tame it in his books. So, just naming and recognizing what’s going on can go so far.
Teri Miller:
Great clip. Yeah. I love that. I hope that the listeners could hear that. I hope that technically the sound was okay so that you could hear that. Name it to tame it. And in that episode she talked also about when your kids are having those big feelings, she said the number one most important thing is acknowledge those feelings. You want to really give your kids this space to be validated in their feelings so that we don’t tell them, you can’t feel that or that’s not okay. And that really is what creates that connection before correction, is acknowledging their feelings and trying to validate and understand.
Teri Miller:
Just like you were talking about Amy, that you felt like that was the big, most important thing. And it is so true. What she talked about is applicable in every relationship. She talked about five positives to one negative, because I confessed my stories of how I’ll come in the house and be like, whose shoes are everywhere, ra ra ra. And she’s like, that’s okay when you’ve done that, then you can go back and offer five positives to that negative, that complaint. But she was super encouraging and had lots of good information. Listeners, it would be a really, really good one to go back to. I would highly recommend it. I gleaned so much again from listening to it again, and it was embarrassing as I confessed some of my failures. Again, that was episode 132 on November 2nd with Kim Feeny.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Awesome. All right. So, number five was Clint Davis. And so Clint is a licensed counselor, a pastor and a trauma therapist. What was the name of his show?
Teri Miller:
Oh goodness. I’m looking for it here. He owns…
Dr. Amy Moore:
All right. Coming in at number five, the fifth most popular episode of 2021 was Clint Davis. And so Clint is a licensed counselor. He’s a trauma specialist. He’s also a pastor. What was his episode?
Teri Miller:
So, it was episode number 121. It aired on 8/10/21, and it was called protecting our kids from sexual abuse.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yes. And it was a super powerful episode.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
I mean he shared some shocking statistics. In fact, let me share some statistics that absolutely shocked us. He said that 82% of people that abuse a child are people we know. That one in three women are sexually abused by age 18, and one in five men. And 62% of kids who have social media get unsolicited requests from adults, and 50% of them answer. I just remember being stunned during that interview of some of the things that he was sharing with us. And while he’s a trauma specialist and he talks a lot about sexual abuse, his big message that day was on something called sexual neglect.
Teri Miller:
Yes.
Dr. Amy Moore:
And while that seemed like such an odd term, like when he first said it, sexual neglect, that seems like a marriage per problem, right?
Teri Miller:
Right. Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
But what he meant was that parents avoid those hard conversations with kids about their bodies, about sex, about pornography, about masturbation, sexuality, like all of these things that kids learn from social media and from their friends that they need to be learning from their parents.
Teri Miller:
Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
And so that then they find themselves in situations, and because their parents haven’t talked to them about it, then they’re afraid to tell anyone because they think that it’s a taboo topic.
Teri Miller:
Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right? And so then they internalize this trauma that they may be going through if they are being sexually abused or exposed to inappropriate materials or whatever the situation may be.
Teri Miller:
Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
So, when he says sexual neglect causes trauma, it’s a domino effect of us not being willing to be uncomfortable by talking to our kids about those uncomfortable things.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right.
Teri Miller:
It was a really, really convicting episode. Actually, I wrote in my notes, it was actually kind of scary. But in a way that I think as parents, we need to have that heads up. We need to have that wake up call because we just go along thinking, oh, it’s okay. That’s awkward. That’s embarrassing. Like you were saying, Amy, like, that’s just so uncomfortable. I don’t want to talk about it. And he just poked us in the Heidi and was like, you need to be paying attention, parents. You need to be paying attention, listeners. This is really important stuff.
Teri Miller:
So, definitely worth taking the time to listen to. Again, that was episode 121. It aired back August 10th. Again, protecting our kids from sexual abuse. Really, really important topic. This might be one, if it’s something that you’re concerned about, that you want to take the time, grab a pencil, grab some paper, take the time, sit down at home and jot down some notes, because he gave some practical tools and take tips and it’s really worth listening to again.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah. Let’s listen to a clip.
Clint Davis:
They experience friendships and sleepovers where everybody’s talking about things they’ve seen and things that kids are talking about at school, but no parent or adult has given them context for that. So, they learn from the other teenagers or 12 year olds, they feel pressured to do things. They end up doing it, but they don’t go and tell anybody because we’ve already communicated to them that we don’t talk about this. So, when we as parents don’t talk about things, we communicate something, right? There’s that adage, you can not communicate.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Wow.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. Really good convicting message. Ouch.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah, absolutely. One of the things I thought, because my kids are older now. Wow, did I get lucky?
Teri Miller:
Yeah
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right? I mean, my youngest is going to be 17 in a few weeks. And so I thought I got lucky.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. Nothing bad happened.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah, absolutely.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. I mean, I feel that somewhat with my kiddos. I was the victim. I was sexually molested at age five, and I was exposed to some bad just pornography for a long time. I was exposed to some pretty rotten stuff as an itty bitty child, 7, 8, 10 years old. And so I’m the one that suffered. And so I’ve been much more aware and open and careful with my kids. Yeah, then our youngest adopted, we don’t know honestly what all she went through in the early years of her life. So, there’s hard stuff out there, people. It’s everywhere. What was your statistic, Amy, the women that have been sexually molested by age 18, you said what was that?
Dr. Amy Moore:
One in three women and one in five men have been sexually abused by age 18.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. So, there you go. I’m the statistic. It’s happening. It’s out there. We need to be talking about it. So, hard topic, definitely worth listening to. Episode 121.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Okay. What’s next?
Teri Miller:
All right. Fourth. Let’s see. Fourth was, man, this is a much happier topic. Her name is Shannon Brescher Shea? And it was episode 130 and it was on October 12th. Shannon Brescher Shea, the topic was teaching kids to care for our world. It was such a great, great show about sustainability, about having an environmental perspective in your family and with your kids. And Shannon is the author of an environmental parenting advice book called Growing Sustainable Together. Practical resources for raising kind engaged, resilient children. And it’s really, really cool because Shannon is writer and an environmental activist in Washington D.C. And so she’s done a lot of political work in that arena. So she just has a lot of experience and not just as a mom, but also from that mom perspective. what stood out out to you? because I’ve got some notes I could go over, but one jumped out.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Well, what stood out To me was, I’m an indoor girl. And so I thought, yes, I love her passion for gardening and saving the environment outside. But what can moms like me who are indoor girls, what can we do to help raise children who care about our world and care about our environment from inside the house? And so she gave some practical tips, recycling, urban gardening ideas.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Even though that’s for city living, it could be applicable for moms like me who aren’t going to get outside with a hoe.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
And till the soil in the outdoor garden that I could do it in a window cell.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah. How about you?
Teri Miller:
Well, I really appreciated, the main thing that jumped out at me is she talked about that you have to find things that encourage sustainability and environmental awareness in your family, that fit your family individually. So, Any, it’s really just what you’re talking about.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yes.
Teri Miller:
That if it doesn’t fit you as a mom and where you live and your neighborhood, to go out and be planting a garden and have chickens and things like that, well then that’s not for you and there’s no reason to waste your time thinking about it, worrying about it, feeling guilty that you don’t have fresh eggs and chickens in your backyard. No worries there. Yeah. Just forget that. Then she said there are things that we can do individually. She talked about riding your bikes to school if you’re close enough that you can do that. Ride bikes to school, to the store, anything that you can do that’s just cutting down on using your car all the time. Using the bus system. Those were examples that she has experienced in her life.
Teri Miller:
But a big thing she talked about is doing things that are small actions with big impact. And so she said, sometimes it’s being seen, and she said, this isn’t in a braggy way, but that, that can have a big impact to normalize that you use the bus system. To normalize that you ride bikes in town instead of just driving everywhere. And that impacts the people around you. And so that’s not only making a choice for your family, but it is creating a bigger impact than just what you might feel is a small action. Yeah, that recycling, it can be that you’re not just recycling, but that people see you recycling. And that may seem silly. But it’s going through the drive through if, well, we shouldn’t be doing that.
Teri Miller:
But anyway, if we are saying, I don’t need a bag, I don’t need a straw. I have a reusable straw. And even speaking that, Hey, I’m going to save the world one straw at a time. I’m going to save the world one bag at a time. Using canvas bags at a store instead of getting the plastic bags. And then letting it be seen that you are using those canvas bags because that inspires others.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yes. I loved that message for sure.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Let’s cue up a clip from her episode.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Shannon Brescher Shea:
From my blog, I did a series of interviews with other people who considered themselves green moms. And one of the questions I asked is, how do you deal with this conflict? And all of them said, there is no conflict. And I was really confused by this. I had a lot of both what I call green guilt, which is feeling like you’re not doing enough environmentally, you’re making too much garbage or you’re driving too much, et cetera, et cetera. And mom guilt, which I’m sure everybody is familiar with. One day I was sitting downstairs on a bean bag in my basement reading a different parenting book, and I realized that the people I was talking to were right. The environmental activities that we involve our kids in, whether that’s gardening or biking and walking places instead of driving, or doing activism, or volunteering in your community, all teach the kinds of values and skills, not just the values, but the skills that at least I wanted my kids to have, and I think a lot of other people want their kids to have.
Teri Miller:
So good.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
Yay. That was a really inspiring little clip.
Dr. Amy Moore:
It was.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
All right. [crosstalk 00:18:49].
Teri Miller:
So, we don’t have to feel so guilty that we’re not doing enough. Okay. I just remembered another little piece that was a shocker to me in that episode, Amy. I don’t know if you remember the moment when she said it. I was talking about mom guilt of, your kids are young, you’re busy, you’re running a million miles an hour. And you’re like, I am just not cleaning out that peanut butter container. Just forget it. I’m sorry. I’m not recycling that, I do not have time. And she was like, “Okay, little secret, most plastic isn’t recycled anyway. So, that may not be an action you need to really focus on. You can just throw that away.”
Dr. Amy Moore:
I don’t remember that-
Teri Miller:
Yes. Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
… it’s a good tip to me.
Teri Miller:
It was like, darn, okay. I’m not going to waste a lot of time on that, then I can do some other things. Unless the peanut butter container’s glass. There you go.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right. Right. All right. So, that was Shannon Brescher Shea, and that was episode number?
Teri Miller:
130.
Dr. Amy Moore:
130?
Teri Miller:
Yeah, 130. And it was October 12th.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Okay.
Teri Miller:
Good one. Okay. So, that was number four. So, number three, we’re getting down. Oh, I should do the drum roll again. In third place, Kaitlin Soule. This was episode 132, and this was September 28th. The episode was called Breakup With Anxiety with Kaitlin Soule. And so Kaitlin Soule, she is so much fun. A little inside secret. Okay. We had to reschedule. We had originally had this episode scheduled with Kaitlin, and she was like on a trip or something and so she was-
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah, she was like in her family’s cabin and she didn’t realize that we used video for one thing, right? And so she’s got her like hair up in a bun.
Teri Miller:
It was awesome.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah. And she’s like, oh, I had no idea, and then she’s cleaning up her room and we ended up having sound problems with her mic.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. Yeah. Because she didn’t have equipment there.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right. Exactly. Because she was on vacation and we finally said, Hey, Soule, that this is the best episode for you. Why don’t we just reschedule for when you’re not on vacation anymore? I think she probably appreciated that because she was in her recording, professional environment. Kaitlyn is a licensed marriage and family therapist, and she’s an anxiety expert. And so she was back in her element when we actually did get to do the recording. She’s also the author of a book that’s coming out in just a couple of months called A Little Less Than a Hot Mess.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. A Little Less of a Hot Mess, which is so perfect because that first encounter with her, I was just like, okay, I love this girl. Oh my goodness. She is so real.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
She was just so like, okay, whatever, give me a minute. I’ll figure this out. And then when we had to reschedule, she was just completely like, okay, no big thing. She just rolled with it.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right. She actually embodies her message.
Teri Miller:
Yes.
Dr. Amy Moore:
She was a total hot mess, but a little less of a hot mess. You can tell that she just has the coping skills to deal with the unexpected, right? And so she just went with it and I love that. Especially as a psychologist to know that we want to be able to model those behaviors that we teach our clients, right? And so she just had it. She had total control over what could have been a massive meltdown, right? And she just played it off beautifully.
Teri Miller:
So inspiring.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
Because, Amy, you know me, I struggle. If I had been in that situation, I would’ve cried for three days straight afterwards. Okay. Maybe not that bad, but I mean, I struggle with anxiety of like, I’ve got to get things just right. And oh my gosh, if I don’t have it all together, everybody’s going to think I’m just terrible. She just was so inspiring. I mean, I just smiled the whole time. I think I was 1,000 times more relaxed for like a full week after we did that episode. I was so much easy on myself. And so then preparing for this, listening to it again, I was inspired all over again. All over again. Again, that perspective that, oh, I can accept who I am. I can be at peace. Her message was one of such acceptance and self value for moms. Do we have a clip? Let’s listen to a clip and then I’ll-
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah, we do have a clip.
Teri Miller:
… a couple things. Yeah.
Kaitlin Soule:
When I talk about breaking up with anxiety, what I mean is changing your relationship with anxiety or worry so that it doesn’t get to be in charge. And so I like to think of it kind of in this ending a toxic relationship with an ex or something like that, right? And so that ex is still going to unfortunately exist in the world, and you maybe have to see him at the grocery store or whatever, or online these days, but you are going to have to learn how to coexist in a world where they exist. So, I think of anxiety in that same way. If we can learn to just coexist with it and let it be there and spend less time trying to resist it and push it away, the better off we are and the better we can cope with it.
Teri Miller:
I love that. I love that analogy.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
It’s still going to be there. I mean, it’s not that she didn’t have anxiety when we had to reschedule that first one, but she just was able to coexist with it and be like, ma, I can be a little less of a hot mess. I can move on. I can be okay with this. I can roll with it.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
So inspiring.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah. I mean, she challenges moms to redefine their idea of perfection right. Because juggling that mental and emotional load of motherhood is hard, right?
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
And so we have to look at, okay, first of all, is perfection even important? Is it even reachable and why do we even care, right?
Teri Miller:
Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. So inspiring. I remember also she talked quite a bit about self care and asked for help, which that’s just really helpful too. As you’re managing anxiety, that’s going to be there. We’re going to have stress. We’re going to have worry. We’re going to see it in the grocery store. Even if we break up with it, it’s going to be there. And then self care can help with that a lot. And then asking for help, being vulnerable enough to ask for help and accept help is such a great thing. And goodness, you know what, it builds relationships. It builds resilience. So, Just a great episode.
Dr. Amy Moore:
It was. Okay. And that was Kaitlin Soule.
Teri Miller:
Yes. Kaitlin Soule. It was again, episode 132, September 28th. And so listeners, if you need a dose of encouragement, moms, if you are feeling tired and weary and you don’t want to take notes, you don’t want to have a to do list. If you want to feel encouraged, go back and listen to that episode, you will breathe easier and some mile bigger. Listen to it once a week. It’s so good.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yes, absolutely. All right. Number two. Number two, our second most popular episode of [crosstalk 00:26:39] was Dr. Sam Goldstein. And so Dr. Sam is a pediatric neuropsychologist. He is the co-author of the book, Tenacity in Children: Nurturing the Seven Instincts for Lifetime Success. And when we got a request from Dr. Sam’s PR person to be on our show, I was so excited because he’s on our bookshelf.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
As clinical researchers, Teri and I use his tests with our research participants. And so his name was so familiar and he’s such an icon in the neuropsychology field, that I was super excited to be able to have him on the show. So, Teri was actually on a mommy sabbatical that week, and so I had a visiting co-host, Sandy Zamalis from Learning RX who helped me interview Dr. Sam. And so he talked about-
Teri Miller:
Let me tell you the episode. It was episode 123. Episode 123 on August 24th August. Okay. Go ahead. Okay.
Dr. Amy Moore:
And so he talked about his new book on Tenacity in Children, and he talked to us a little bit about the difference between tenacity, and resilience and grit. But the main idea, the main takeaway was that children have these seven instinctive behaviors that are there genetically, born with these instincts that then need to be nurtured by the environment, that make the am tenacious, that make them resilient in the world. And that we have to stop looking at children through a lens of a medical model. Okay, what’s wrong with this child that we need to fix, and start looking at children through a resilience model or a strengths model, right? So, what are the strengths and assets of this child that we can build on, that we can nurture in order to make them resilient people?
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
So, let’s listen to a clip.
Dr. Sam Goldstein:
Because we’d reached a point in our careers where we realized that we were spending all of our time fruitlessly trying to fix what was wrong with children. And we began to realize that the more liabilities a child possesses, the more important their assets become. And we were doing just the opposite. The more liabilities they possess, the more focused we were on fixing what was wrong. We looked at the longitudinal research that demonstrated those who fared well under adversity were not necessarily those who had the most treatment, medicine, school intervention, counseling, but rather those who had other assets that Bob coined islands of competence, something that carried them through.
Teri Miller:
So good.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah. I mean, it’s a totally different perspective, isn’t it?
Teri Miller:
Yes. [crosstalk 00:29:52].
Dr. Amy Moore:
And I love where he said, “The more liabilities a child has, the more we need to focus on their assets.”
Teri Miller:
Yeah. Instead of focusing on the liabilities. That’s so good.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah. I mean, and you think about children who do have struggles, whether they have a neurodevelopmental disorder, or a learning disability or some kind of diagnosis, you think about the sense of defeat that they feel, right?
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
And so to be able to focus on what they can do has to give them just a renewed sense of motivation for conquering all that they struggle with even.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
Well, in building their tenacity, their resilience. Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right.
Teri Miller:
Listening to the episode in preparation for us doing this, again, it was episode 123. And listening to it, this is what I felt like. So, if you’re hearing this, moms, you may want to set this one aside for when you’ve got some time to focus and really, really learn from it. I listened through it and was like, okay, I’ve got to go back to this one with pen and paper and take notes, and really dig in and really learn from it because there is so much information. It’s incredible. I mean, I feel like it was an entire parenting book. It was like a textbook in that hour podcast that I could have been scribbling notes almost the entire time. So, I think it’s like hugely, hugely valuable, but you’re going to get more out of it if you sit down and really focus than if you just kind of listen to it on your drive. That’s what I would suggest.
Dr. Amy Moore:
No, I agree. Because Dr. Sam actually goes through those seven instincts.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Right. And so he talks about optimism, and motivation, and empathy and all of those things that we can nurture as parents with ideas and examples. I mean, it’s rich
Teri Miller:
Very. Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah.
Teri Miller:
Okay. So, that was second place. It was awesome. Sam Goldstein, nurturing tenacity in children episode 123. And we are now to our first place, most popular, most listened to episode.
Dr. Amy Moore:
All right. So, the number one most popular, most listened to episode of 2021 was Danica Copp . Danica is a licensed clinical psychotherapist, and she specializes in teenagers, right? So, she doesn’t treat adults, she doesn’t treat little kids. She only works with teenagers. And as part of that work, Danica has developed a checklist of everything that your teen needs to know before they leave your house, right?
Teri Miller:
Launching your teen into adulthood.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yes. Like how to make a doctor appointment, how to manage conflict with a roommate in college, how to book a plane ticket, how to deposit a check, how to apply for a job, how to mail a package. I mean, lots of stuff that you don’t even think of. It’s 13 pages long. First of all, it’s a free checklist, you all.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
So, if you listened to the episode or look at the show notes, you can get the download link. But her biggest message is, don’t wait until your kids graduate from high school to start teaching them the stuff they need to be adults.
Teri Miller:
Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
That needs to start in adolescence.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. So, it was episode 129. Danica Copp launching your teen into adulthood episode 129. It was on October 5th. Yeah, like Amy’s talking about, this amazing checklist, super, super helpful. Even if you don’t like literally go through the checklist with your teenager, it opened my eyes to things that, I just do their laundry. I’ve never showed my kids how to use a washer and dryer. And on the checklist is, how do you use a washer and dryer? Where does the soap go? Okay. So, listening to this episode, I have to tell you, I laughed so much just listening to it. So, if you want to listen to just a really inspiring and encouraging episode to really help you as you’ve got preteens, teenagers and so many funny stories. Amy, if you would go back and listen to this, it’s just a laugh fest.
Teri Miller:
We just crack each other up with our story of the things our kids did and how we really messed it up and little things. Yeah. Like son Caleb in a fender bender, and he just didn’t know. I never taught him that people have insurance and insurance pays for wrecks. And a little old lady hit it him and she was so sad and he was so sweet. He was like, don’t worry about it. And he had like $2,000 worth of damage on his car. He didn’t get her name nothing. Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yeah. And I think I probably mentioned that I had never taught Kale how to make sure that the pharmacy takes your health insurance.
Teri Miller:
Yep.
Dr. Amy Moore:
So, what he calls me and he says, mom, these eyedrops were $126.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Well, that’s on me, right?
Teri Miller:
Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
I mean, it makes you stop and think, wait a minute, how do we expect our teens to know if we haven’t taught them? And so for Danica to create this checklist, I thought was genius. Let’s listen to a clip of her episode.
Teri Miller:
Yes.
Danica Copp:
And I think parents nowadays really struggle with like, at 18 is my kid really ready? And probably not, which is why a lot of kids do go to college where there is kind of that built in safety net. But the idea that your child needs to be able to make decisions on their own, to not always be solving our kids problems. Because when we do that in middle school and high school, they then expect, well, mom will fix it. And we want to create children, young adults who can problem solve, who don’t feel like, oh, mom will do it. And I think that there’s a level of us that don’t like to see our children sit with discomfort, of course not. But where does the most growth occur in life? When we are uncomfortable, when we hit a pain point, when we struggle through something. And so we need to allow our kids to have those struggles while they’re in their safety net of our homes.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Okay. So, we were to apologize. We used our IG Instagram real clip for that, and so there was some music in the background. We promised the episode does not have music playing through it. So, anyway.
Teri Miller:
And it’s funny, that little clip, that was more like serious and she’s really talking about how this is so important. It is. The episode is serious. There is great value. And yet preparing for us to do this, of everything I listened to, oh my gosh. It was so entertaining. It was hilarious. I just had so much fun listening to it again because she tells a hilarious story about a fire extinguisher, needing it and not knowing how to use it.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Well, and she has such a big personality.
Teri Miller:
Yeah. She’s so fun.
Dr. Amy Moore:
She’s just got this presence about her that there was so much energy in the episode.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
It was super enjoyable.
Teri Miller:
It’s a great one. So, I would say, moms, this is a great one. Listen to on your drive, listen to when you’re home doing dishes with kids, whatever. I mean, this is a fun one you could listen to with your kids, because your kids will get tickled and they’ll laugh at themselves and they’ll think, oh wow, do I know how to do that? So, it’s a really fun one that you can just listen to. It’s entertaining. And then I would say, take the time to download that checklist. And again, even if you don’t go through item by item with your teenager, it’ll really spark your thinking. What do my kids need to know before they’re launched? So, really, really great topic.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Absolutely.
Teri Miller:
129 on October 5th, Danica Copp.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Danica Copp.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
So, those were our six most popular episodes from 2021. That is not to say that the other episodes aren’t fantastic as well. We just chose solely based on the number of downloads.
Teri Miller:
Right.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Those were the most popular for sure. So, look, we have so much coming up in 2022, right?
Teri Miller:
Yes.
Dr. Amy Moore:
More authors, more experts, just more conversations about being a mom, being a working mom, being a stay at home mom, juggling motherhood with all of the other responsibilities. Conversation about child and adolescent development, mental health, educational-
Teri Miller:
Educational options.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Yes. And we’re going to talk about educational choices.
Teri Miller:
That’s coming up in January.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Coming up January for educational choice week, I think, right?
Teri Miller:
Yes.
Dr. Amy Moore:
We’re going to talk about options for autism treatment. I mean, we’ve got so much. We’re booked through April already and we’re so excited just to be able to continue bringing all of these experts to our listeners. This is the podcast for smart moms, and so we hope that after every episode you feel like you’re a little smarter than you were before you listened.
Teri Miller:
Yeah.
Dr. Amy Moore:
For sure.
Teri Miller:
Hey, and thank you. Listeners, thank you for tuning in, for listening. And I would encourage you to spread the word. I mean, I’m going to just ask that you would spread the word and tell others about the Brainy Moms podcast, so that our listenership increases and we can really get the word out there that we’ve got just some great information, and entertainment, and fun and inspiration, just a whole gamut of things that are going to encourage you as a mom and help you in your quest to be a brainy mom.
Dr. Amy Moore:
Absolutely. And we would also like to open it up to you all to give us your requests. Is there something that you would like to hear us talk about? Is there a guest that you would like to hear from? If so, leave us a note on social media. Every social media platform we are under the handle @thebrainymoms. You could also send an email directly to me at [email protected]. That’s, co not .com. So, [email protected]. I’d love to hear your ideas for sure.
Teri Miller:
Dr. Amy Moore:
Absolutely.
Teri Miller:
T-E-R-I Teri.
Dr. Amy Moore:
T-E-R-I. So look, if you love to our show today or any day, we would love it IF you would leave us a five star rating and review on Apple Podcasts. We’d love it if you would follow us on social media, again, that’s @thebrainymoms. And hey, if you would rather watch us, we are on YouTube. We have our own Brainy Moms channel. And so you can see the video instead of listening anytime you want. So, look, until next time, we know that you’re busy moms and we’re busy moms. We hope you have a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, and we will see you in 2022. We’re out.
Teri Miller:
See ya. See ya.
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